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If you had the chance to go back.....

Discussion in 'Issues Around the World' started by Andy, Jan 3, 2003.

  1. Andy


    If you had the chance to go back into your past, and smack yourself upside the head to make a different choice in life than you did the first time, would you?

    And if so what would you say?

    For me, it's always been the one that got away.

    I was young and stupid, (synonymous terms, no doubt!;) ) and thought I knew what was best for me.
    The one that got away, is now a prominent Lawyer in NYC living in the upper west side.
    My ex-wife is living in a "double-wide" in AZ. (do the math!:nut: )

    Although I highly doubt that I could really make such a change to my life knowing that I would not have my kids that I have now.

    I guess it boils down to the fact that things in life happen for a reason.
  2. ethics

    ethics Pomp-Dumpster Staff Member

    Firstly, great discussion! I am sure others will chime in with their thoughts on the topic.

    Secondly, I, too, have an enormous amount of things I wish to have changed but there's this one speck of darkness, at the back of the brain, that tells me not to fiddle with things the way they were.

    My beliefs are certainly your quote above.
  3. jamming

    jamming Banned

    I think everyone would want to, but would they if they could? I don't know, everytime you correct things you also have the chance of making it worse too.
  4. Biker

    Biker Administrator Staff Member

    If pre-knowledge was a factor and knowing then what I know now, yes, there would be something I would change. In a heartbeat, consequences of tampering be damned. Funny what you'd do for love, isn't it?
  5. Steve

    Steve Is that it, then?

    Specific events? None that I can think of, off-hand, so I suppose there are none, really.

    Specific aspects of my personality? Sure! I think we all would have liked to have been more confident and self-assured at 15; a little more introspective at 22. I don't know if those kinds of things can be brought about by being "told" to act in any particular fashion.

    Maturity, and all the trappings in life that come with it, needs to be earned. Some people are relatively more mature than others, at any given age. Some never mature, at all. For the most part, though, I think most of us need to travel that too-short road we call "life" and experience the journey for ourselves.

    OK, I would go back to Misawa, Japan, at the age of 13, on a particular Friday night at the Youth Center, and slap my younger self senseless to prevent myself from ever taking that first puff of cigarette. That, I would change.
  6. Domh

    Domh Full Member

    You old-school geeks will get this.

    I was 10 years old living in Hanover NH, hanging out at the Kiewit Computing Center at Dartmouth with the guys who invented BASIC and setup one of the first major backbone routers in the country - the year was 1978.

    They loved me, I loved computers... the future was pretty obvious... were talking sub-basement of the internet revolution, and I was right there, at the right time, the right place, at the right age, with the right skills and interests and the INSANE connections with the people who basically invented the Net.

    But no - at the age of 14 I decided smoking pot all day was the way to go...

    Where might I be now?

    Its of no consequence. I chose what I chose and I am where I am.

    But I think on it sometimes, and somewhere deep inside it fucking hurts - it hurts ALOT... like somebody whispering a secret to me and I can hear them, barely, but I just dont understand.
  7. tke711

    tke711 Oink Oink Staff Member

    I wouldn't change a thing.

    Sure, I have made, and continue to make, mistakes or bad decisions. However, these decisions, good or bad, have all led me to where I am today.

    I have a wonderful and loving wife, a beautiful baby girl, a lucrative and successful career, and great friends and family. Life is pretty damn good.

    When I look back on my younger years, I am embarrassed and regret some of the things I did. However, all of these things, good and bad, have brought me to where I am today and have shaped the person I am.

    Because of this, I would not want to change a thing. It's a game that is way to dangerous for me to play.
  8. Misu

    Misu Hey, I saw that.

    The only thing I'd change would be I would have talked to my dad before he died, rather than have been the stupid stubborn bitch that I am famous for being and not talked to him his final week of life.
  9. pcysmith

    pcysmith Paula

    There must be one or two women out there today who said "In your dreams!" when a dorky looking geek named Bill Gates asked them out in high school. Can you imagine the "what ifs" that would have to be going through their minds? "Billion" is a very erotic word.:)
  10. ShinyTop

    ShinyTop I know what is right or wrong!

    Ya, but if Bill had gotten any he would not have been hanging out in garages programming.
  11. pcysmith

    pcysmith Paula

    Ya think? Then I have to wonder what we would be doing today. Or maybe how we'd be doing it. God, do you think the whole world would be a different place if Bill Gates got laid in high school?
  12. ShinyTop

    ShinyTop I know what is right or wrong!

    In detail only. I tend to think individuals in the technology field who are credited with innovation were in the right place at the right time. If it had not been Bill somebody else would have kicked this off. And it might have been somebody a little less bloodthirsty and greedy. Bill has done much for computing but the bodies of the little guys he has outmuscled with his billions belie the myth that MS has innovated anything.
  13. Coriolis

    Coriolis Bob's your uncle

    I've often fantasized about what it would be like if I could go back in time, to a certain age, and correct some of the stupid things I've done. There are many choices I've made that I now regret, but they pale in comparison to the choices that I've made which I do not regret. So ultimately, I would not go back and change anything, for fear of the slightest chance that I would not have encountered that pretty blonde in the hallway of the engineering building at my university, who eventually became and my wife, and gave birth to our kids. I guess the furthest back I would go would therefore be after the birth of my last child, and I suppose there are a few things I'd change between then and now, but it's too soon to know whether those things I'd change would have a negative or positive impact upon where I am right now at this moment in time. So in conclusion, no, I'll just let the chips fall where they may.
  14. ShinyTop

    ShinyTop I know what is right or wrong!

    My first marriage ended in divorce. But to wish it had never happened would be to wish away my son. I cannot do that. I might have chosen a different doctor for my back surgery. I would definitely have gone for disability last March when my back deteriorated. Instead I thought I can work. I worked long enough to be laid off. The difference between social security disability and the disability insurance I had at work is about $1200 a month.
  15. cdw

    cdw Ahhhh...the good life.

    I would have gone on the trip to Germany with my grandparents when they offered. I would have gone to college. And I would have stayed away from drugs.
  16. ethics

    ethics Pomp-Dumpster Staff Member

    Cyd? Drugs? Really?
  17. cdw

    cdw Ahhhh...the good life.

    lol... yep. Well, hell, I am a child of the 60's ya know.
    I fought it for the longest time too.. I think I was the last of our "group" that got involved. Probably the last woman in the group to begin using curse words. But, once I got started, hell, I was on a tear for quite some time. I did not do heroine.... that was drilled into me by my 7th grade science teacher who convinced me that even one granual would make us hooked. So, that was a no-no. I tripped a couple of times, but was panicked that I would NEVER come down and end up brain dead or "stuck" in the world of unreality as was being reported during the VietNam war days. So, that was out.
    Speed was my choice, with pot. It wasn't daily, but, it was a bit more than recreational. Although at the time, I would never have admitted that.
  18. ethics

    ethics Pomp-Dumpster Staff Member

    Wow, thanks for sharing. :)
  19. cdw

    cdw Ahhhh...the good life.

    Hey, no problem... that's what this place is for, no?
    If I ever gave the impression that I was a straight arrow, do gooder all the time, don't believe it... I'm just practicing to get a job in the political arena. :)
    But, I will say this.... what I have done in my past has brought me to the place I am today....many of the views I hold now are because of all the excuses I used on myself. I know them. They were bullshit then and they still are.
  20. ethics

    ethics Pomp-Dumpster Staff Member

    Which goes back to my point, Cyd, and others mentioned this as well.

    While it WOULD be nice to go back, the result would be skewed and you would NOT -- for better or worse -- be the same person you are today.

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