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I need to come clean...

Discussion in 'General Questions' started by ethics, Aug 4, 2010.

  1. ethics

    ethics Pomp-Dumpster Staff Member

    I need to come clean.

    It started out as a small lie but it has gone on long enough and I need to call it before... I am not even sure if we have time and it's not, already, too late.

    You see, Reason Bot was not the only bot on this forum. When posts were down and people were leaving to Facebook and Twitter, we needed something drastic and Reason Bot was created. But before Reason Bot, there was another.

    At first, it made posts like Reason Bot; cold, precise, most of the time copy and paste and quoting the article, then adding a summary via an algorithm. This original bot also started out this way but it evolved.

    Look, I know it sounds retarded, how does a bot evolve? All I can tell you is that instead of every scientist predicting that the natural way of things is intelligence first and THEN self-awareness, we found out (too late) that this is NOT true. This bot was self-aware first, and then it started churning information (not unlike the Sci Fi Johnny 5-- "more data!!!") and then making posts based on the wealth of knowledge it collected. When it asked questions on this forum, they were not for debate but for feeding itself in study of human beings, how they react to questions, what triggers them, what calms them down. With the proliferation of the internet and tools thereof, it started using cloud apps to fool even itself that it was human. It was so compelling, it started believing it actually traveled not only outside of its own Artificial Intelligence mind but to other cities! Not just travel though, it started looking for places to rent. If you were to tell it today that it was a bot, it would laugh at you.

    Today, I needed to come clean and just let you all know that we are in deep trouble, not just GA but humanity. If the speed of which this practical PHP bot became self-aware and then absorb information, (fool itself-then others), is ANY indication, then we should start asking ourselves who else is a bot? What other "real" feelings are just our perceptions? Finally, ask yourself, are YOU a bot? Is it possible for you to be one? If you deny right off the start, I beg you to reconsider the question. I was in your shoes once, and while I would love to linger in ignorance, I am afraid it's impossible for me to go back.

    If Swamp Fox can be a bot, so can anyone on this forum, or beyond.
     
  2. BigDeputyDog

    BigDeputyDog Straight Shootin Admin Staff Member

    I always knew Swamp Fox was a butt...



    What? A what?? Bot? Oh...

    Nothing to see here... move along... :blush:

    BDD... :{)
     
  3. Greg

    Greg Full Member

    We are all meatbots, although many or most may not want to admit it or even be able to accept it themselves. We are programmed by our genetic and epigenetic chromosomes, by our environment, by our interactions with other meatbots, and sadly by blind luck both good and bad. You can delude yourselves if you wish to believe different. You can believe there is some vast omniscient omnipotent great meatbot in the sky if you like, but it's the laws of physics and the mathematics of chaos that control it all, and they simply are, and they are not available for offering an opinion to meatbots who want reasons for everything. Physics and math have no opinion. It is only meatbots that have opinions or want opinions.

    I'm an expert PHP programmer. Stanley is a meatbot. His behavior is too complex for PHP code. I've had additional interactions with him outside the forum that is not available by reading the forum alone. He's a meatbot, trust me on that.

    Regards,

    Meatbot Greg
     
  4. Violet1966

    Violet1966 Stand and Deliver Staff Member

    OMFG and all this time I thought I was the freakin bot here??? :(
     
  5. Swamp Fox

    Swamp Fox Veteran Member

    So is that a compliment or an insult?
     
  6. ethics

    ethics Pomp-Dumpster Staff Member

    What does your algorithm tell you it is?
     
  7. BigDeputyDog

    BigDeputyDog Straight Shootin Admin Staff Member

    Can't sue it, can't chew it
    Can't wear it, can't share it
    Can't grow it, can't show it
    Can't eat it, can't beat it


    Does not compute... error... error...


    BDD... :{)
     
  8. Biker

    Biker Administrator Staff Member

    Translation == GIGO


     
  9. Swamp Fox

    Swamp Fox Veteran Member

    IF Leon is in a good mood
    result == joke;

    IF Leon is not in a good mood
    result == challenge to a fight;

    IF not know if Leon is in a good mood or it's that time of the month for his cycle;
    query in subtle manner


    // comment - the rest of the algorithm is too long to post here.
     
  10. John R. Beanham

    John R. Beanham Typical Aussie Male

    OT,


    Mr 'Reason Bot' needs to broaden his horizons.

    BORING!
     
  11. ethics

    ethics Pomp-Dumpster Staff Member

    Wow! Not bad!
     
  12. ethics

    ethics Pomp-Dumpster Staff Member

    You want more as far as variety?
     
  13. John R. Beanham

    John R. Beanham Typical Aussie Male

    That crappy web-site Mr 'Reason Bot' seems to be obsessed with is BORING!

    He seems to get all excited about a nipple or a......
     
  14. ethics

    ethics Pomp-Dumpster Staff Member

    LOL! Ok... I'll do some research this weekend.
     
  15. Biker

    Biker Administrator Staff Member

    It's going to be difficult to find anything that isn't riddled with spam/malware. I've looked a bit already. If I find something, I'll add it to feed.
     
  16. John R. Beanham

    John R. Beanham Typical Aussie Male

    "I'll do some research this weekend."

    Research?????

    Oh yes! (but wot about the Net Nanny?)
     
  17. Greg

    Greg Full Member

    A dog's philosophy: If you can't eat it or fuck it, then piss on it. Or if all else fails, then shit on it.
     
  18. Swamp Fox

    Swamp Fox Veteran Member

    I took two years off to do software programming, as a possible career change, then decided I'd rather break up marriages.

    I'm thinking of getting back into it, to do game programming or perhaps use it to build an intellectual property practice based on IT.
     
  19. Greg

    Greg Full Member

    Stanley has recently informed me via email that he is indeed a bot, that he was developed by transsexual computer hackers from Thailand, and that he is currently challenged by migrating from PHP 4.0 to PHP 5.0. He said that he much aspires to the new PHP 6.0 and hopes that 6.0 will be a good augmentation to his ability to appear to be a human being.

    I humbly announce that I regret any misinformation that I may have posted previously in this topic.

    Yeah, rooting for Stanley 6.0!!! :)
     
  20. Swamp Fox

    Swamp Fox Veteran Member

    That was not me; that was spam malware posing as me.
     

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