Hey folks, below is what I posted on my blog and don't wish to rewrite. I feel closer to folks here so I will let you know what is going on. I've been diagnosed with a degenerative heart condition that is untreatable outside of diuretics, steroids and finally a transplant. 3 cardiologists now have said the same thing, I went to three because the damn thing is incredibly rare and usually occurs in younger folks or those who have had transplants, restrictive cardiomiopathy. We are taking this a day at a time right now as I really just had it confirmed. Timing is a bit of a guess, but from what they have seen in the CT, biopsy and other work, about 3-4 years. I will be evaluated for a transplant soon, that process hasn't begun yet. Doctors aren't very happy with some of my other medical conditions, so this might be a fight to be considered, a "good risk". Right now it is just diuretics which I hadn't realized how badly I needed. I've lost 30 lbs of EXCESS water weight, neck down 1 1/2 inches, waist 2. What started the testing was waking up one morning and my feet were so swollen I couldn't get my shoes on. Needless to say, they have gone down a ton. I'm feeling much much better without all that fluid. My wife is handling it okay, my daughter, being the pragmatic little thing that she is made me laugh. She has already inherited my gastro-problems so when I told her what was going on her first question was, "So, am I going to get this too?" I had an enjoyable 30 minutes with that teasing her. "Your first question isn't, gee dad, how are you? What can I do to help? or Is there anything you need? Nooooo, your first question is *sigh* am I gonna get it too?" Gave me a chuckle when I needed it. I'll be around here more than other places. Anyway, like I said, below is what I posted to my blog. Thanks. ______________________________________ Life Deals From Under the Deck... And sometimes catches you with joker or deuce when an ace was needed. I'm posting this before even speaking to my wife or other family members. I got some unexpected news from the doctor, something you really don't expect when you aren't even 40. While my health has never been terrific, when your told to spend time with your family and loved ones you listen. No, I won't go into detail, sufficeth to say that a problem has been found which is making me rethink priorities. I have a loving wife and have been married for many years (17). I met my wife in Korea and when she came to the US, didn't speak a lick of English. Those were some tough times that if we weren't as close as we were, it would have never worked. Speaking fluent Korean on my part was certainly a help. Her family wasn't helpful either, her mother and father disowning her for marrying me. See, my wife comes from one of those families of 'class' and it was a huge blow to have a daughter marry an American. It's funny because my wife is the only child of 5 that is in a happy marriage. Anyway, it took the birth of our daughter three years after we were married for them to finally accept us and allow me in their home. Before they passed away, I felt our relationship was a good one. Anyway, my wife has been my rock. She has a will of iron, nobody, and I mean nobody, crosses her. Yet, with that, she helps anyone in need. I chuckle at our food bill because my wife feels she has to feed every wayward Korean that attends BYU and is in need of a good home cooked meal. Believe me, she is an amazing cook. In fact, I don't know any Korean within 50 miles whose cooking compares. Whenever we have a get together, our home is packed. She has seen me through good and difficult times; this one will be particularly hard. She'll be okay, but it will be hard. One good thing is she has a good relationship with my parents as well as being incredibly close to our daughter. While she'll be strong for me, for now, I'll need to be the strong one, I know. That's okay though, I can do that. To be blunt, I'm not sure how to broach this with her. I'm being a coward, I came to work after seeing the doctor. I should have gone home. I'll think of something. Anyway, until I do, I'll sit here for a while...I have more to write. I have a 14 year old daughter, I'm sure some are sick of my posting pictures and video of her here. She is the apple of my eye as the saying goes. A perfect child, few are blessed with that. She is a straight "A" student, a concert pianist, a ballerina, ballroom dancer and loving daughter. Is she spoiled? Sure. Why not? When she does everything I could ask of her and beyond why wouldn't I spoil her. One of the things I'm most proud of is the way she stands up for others. She is very popular, but will not stand for other kids to be put down or bullied. She has far more guts, far more integrity than her father did at that age. Of course, at 14, there at times that we butt heads, that is just normal. Still, I'm proud to see the way she is developing. I'm also extremely proud of her devotion to God. We are a very religious family and my daughter has been that way since early childhood. She has a very personal relationship with her Father in Heaven for which I am grateful as I know this will sustain her through difficult times in the future. I'm also grateful for the relationship I have with her. She tells me her friends get jealous of how close of a family we are. There are few secrets and she is very open and honest about what is happening in her life, her friend's lives, school, etc. She knows she can tell me anything, good or bad. That's what I'm here for. I'm glad that I've accomplished that much. We have had some amazing discussions, ones that I could never have had with my own parents. Yet, I'm still dad. I'm not her best friend, her best buddy, that's not my role. It's important, I think, to have this type of relationship. She knows that I can fix things, I can make things better. Yet, she also knows there are rules, boundaries which we expect her not to cross. I always figured I would be there to fix things forever, another deuce. Oh well, that's about it. I'll still post, I just won't post as often as other priorities are taking place. I've enjoyed this though. I think a site like mine is needed. Being a lightening rod hasn't been a problem for the most part. There are too many that think Japan is perfect, it isn't. It has flaws, serious flaws. It scares the hell out of me what that means for the future. I see China pushing harder and harder and with the massive amount of money they have spent on their military, I can see them using it. I can also see the US becoming more and more isolationist, especially after Iraq, something I fully supported and still support. Still, you can only take so much criticism from the rest of the world before you say, "Screw you, handle it on your own." Because of this, Japan has got to be the leader in Asia that can rally the rest of the nations. It has to have a strong military, one that doesn't frighten anyone other than China. I feel strongly that this can not happen until they rectify past problems, especially with Korea. Is it all Japan's fault? No, of course not. But Japan is making enough stupid mistakes that until they are corrected the flaws of others won't be recognized. So, with that, I'm taking a deep breath, pushing back from the keyboard and spending some quality time with my family. Luckily, things were found quick enough that I have the time to spend with my family. If what the doc says is right and the future cards dealt aren't as bad as they were today, I could see my daughter graduate high school (she's a sophomore next year). I'll still be around, in my mind, I'll post every week or so, but we'll see. Thanks for the support, the lively discussion and the general goodwill, even when disagreeing. Live everyday like it's your last, it just might be. Now it's time to go be with my wife.